Do Not Worry

The Bible frequently says, "Do Not Worry." That's a command we really want to follow! The Bible says that worry "weighs down the heart" (Proverbs 12:25). We often lose sleep, feel uncomfortable, and create other health problems (which lead to further worry). Thought patterns of worry can even contribute to the loss of control of breathing and other physical symptoms in a "panic attack." We all recognize we would be better off if we could follow this command. However, how do we do it? Simply saying over and over in our mind "Do not worry," will not work!

Fortunately, the Bible gives us the strategy we need to follow this command. While it may not be easy to implement, neither is continuing to worry! We probably would rather have nothing to worry about, than to learn how to not worry. However, Jesus says, "In this world you will have trouble, but take courage! I have overcome the world" (John 16:33).  Jesus outlines a strategy of overcoming worry by addressing issues of the heart first, thinking second, and finally faith in the Sermon on the Mount in Matthew 6:25-34.

First, the heart. Jesus begins by saying, "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life" (Matthew 6:25). So, "Do not worry," is a command that is the result of the teaching Jesus had just given. He says, "therefore," because the reason we are not to worry is based on the previous principle. What was that principle? "Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth...but store up for yourselves treasures in heaven." That is because treasures of this earth are temporary. Jesus adds, "For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also" (Matthew 6:19-21). Throughout the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus urges us to love God and seek His glory above all other things. He returns to this theme again in the passage on worry, concluding that section with, "Seek first His kingdom and His righteousness" (Matthew 6:33). If the desires of your heart are aimed in the right direction (God's glory and living to please God), then you are on the path away from worry.

Second, Jesus addresses our thoughts. When your heart is focused on the right thing, you are now ready to correct faulty thinking that leaves the door open to worry.

"Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?" -Matthew 6:26-27

Here Jesus invites us to "look" and therefore think about the birds. We cannot imagine them pacing back and forth on a tree branch, worrying about their next meal. We know this doesn't make sense. Jesus wants to make sure we are thinking correctly about God. First, we are more valuable to God than the birds, who he cares for. Second, worrying accomplishes nothing. We cannot improve our situation by worrying. Third, Jesus goes on to say that God knows exactly what our needs are (Matthew 6:32). Jesus keeps explaining that thinking the right thoughts about God is going to lead us away from worry. God is a good God who cares about us and is in complete control of every situation. In addition, He knows exactly what our needs are. When our hearts and thoughts are lined up correctly, where is there room for worry? Yes difficult times will come, but God is in control. He will only let us go through what is ultimately for the good (Romans 8:28).

The final area to work on is faith. Jesus addresses those who worry as having "little faith" (Matthew 6:30). Even if our heart is aimed in the right direction, and we know the right things about God, there is still one possible cause of worry - a lack of faith. We know the right things about God, but are we really trusting Him? Here, we can ask God for help. Jesus says, "Ask and it will be given you" (Matthew 7:7). Paul writes, "I can do everything through him who gives me strength" (Philippians 4:13). The context of Paul's statement is overcoming worry even in difficult circumstances (see Philippians 4:4-13). Ask for God's help to trust Him in difficult circumstances, and He will answer and give you the strength to do it.

If you are struggling with worry, keep working on these three areas - heart, thinking, and faith. Ask God to help you. Jesus wants you to be free from the burden of worry.


Trust the Bible's purpose is to grow your confidence that the Bible is true and the ultimate resource for life." You can join the Facebook group by clicking here.Trust the Bible is a weekday radio program that begins at about 8:10 each morning on WDOG 93.5 in Allendale, SC. You can listen to previous programs online here: http://www.fairfaxfbc.org/trust-the-bible.html

The Bible and Same-sex relationships, Part 2

In my previous post, I addressed three Bible verses that demonstrate beyond any reasonable doubt that the Bible does not affirm same-sex relationships. Is this an unreasonable position? At least 10 arguments are frequently made today to say "Yes, you cannot trust the Bible because of its position on this issue." I will briefly state each of these and offer a response below each one.

1. "They are born that way"/"God made me this way."
      First, Christians have often too quickly dismissed the idea of sexual orientation. An attraction to people of the same sex is often powerful, develops early in life, and is not something someone simply chooses to have one day. However, it is another leap to say that God has "made" a person this way. Studies on identical twins reveal that anywhere from 50% to 75% of a time one twin has a same-sex orientation, the other does not. That means without a doubt that you cannot explain sexual orientation primarily by genetics.
     But could the cause be something beyond a person's control? Actually, yes. There may be a relationship between genetic factors, events during pregnancy, social environment, and traumatic events at an early age. However, none of these things mean that the Bible is unreasonable. The Bible itself teaches that we are born with a sin nature because of Adam, and that we live in a fallen world where sin is destructive and even warps our behavior.
     In biblical thinking, having a same-sex orientation may be the result of having someone sin against them, their own sin nature (which everyone has) or even a medical issue during a pregnancy that is itself a sign of the sinful, fallen world we live in. The Bible gives a very realistic picture of the suffering that sin causes, and explains the causes. God did not design the world to be this way. The Bible does not always give the easy or popular answer, it seeks to truthfully tell us why things are the way they are. The Bible also points us toward the solution, and a reason to hope - Jesus Christ. People who have a same-sex orientation will have a certain set of challenges in living out the Christian faith, but so does everyone else who is seeking to live according to the Scriptures.

2. "Why would someone choose to be this way?"
     Again, same-sex orientation comes with a set of challenges, but everyone goes through life with challenges. The Bible is God's gift to us to show us the right way to respond. God's instructions are loving, they show us the path to true success, happiness, and peace in life. Although someone may not choose their orientation, they can certainly choose what they will do with it. Disobeying biblical rules may help a person feel good for a time, but it will not ultimately be helpful. This is true with any sin.

3. "Animals do it."
     I have heard this type of argument so many times. Really? Are we going to base our sexual morality on what animals do? I don't think I need to elaborate more.

4. "Love Wins"
     What is your understanding of "Love"? Following biblical teaching does not mean a man cannot love another man. It means a man cannot have sex with another man. For the "Love Wins" argument to work, "love" has to be defined as synonymous with sex. The Bible gives us a much deeper understanding of love. Jesus loved us so much that he died in humiliation on a cross for our sins. This same Jesus taught that sex and marriage relationships should be between a man and a woman. I trust Jesus view on this issue, and that his view is the most loving view, than what "seems" right to our culture at this time.

5. "We cannot impose our morality on others."
     Well, no. I cannot make someone be righteous. However, I am obligated at times to speak about what is right and wrong. If this statement is saying that our laws must endorse same-sex marriage, or relationships, then that is an entirely different matter. Just because I cannot prevent you from sin does not mean the government should support your sin by affirming it. See #6.

6. "This is a civil rights issue."
     Since same-sex attraction is not genetic, it is not the same as race, something someone is clearly born with. But even if the attraction was genetic, the behavior is not. There are all sorts of behaviors that people may have a "genetic predisposition" toward. But no reasonable person would consider treating other behaviors by marking off a special class deserving of legal protection like race and gender.
     The definition of marriage is not a civil rights issue. It is a definition of marriage issue. Before marriage was redefined by the courts, it was available to every person regardless of race or gender. The only thing that changed was what the definition of a marriage is. The Bible defines it as a life-long commitment between a man and a woman. The courts have now ruled that marriage is something different than that.
     In a democratic republic like ours, people can have different views on this issue. Those who support same-sex marriage can elect officials who can pass laws to recognize same-sex marriage, and those who oppose it should have the right to seek legal means of opposing it. However, the Supreme Court by-passed this process. They based their decision on the assumption that homosexuality is not a behavior, but an essential part of who a person is, like a race. They did so not because of science or any secular field of study, but purely because of the political will to do so. Since the Bible says otherwise, that homosexuality is in fact a behavior and not at all like race, the Supreme Court had to essentially rule that the Bible is wrong in order to make the decision they made.

7. "You don't want to be on the wrong side of history."
     Of course, if the Bible is right, affirming same-sex relationships is the wrong side of history. God's say in the matter is more definitive than where our culture is right now, or where it appears to be heading, because God has the final say on the matter.

8. "Do not Judge."
     The kind of "judging" that Jesus has in view here is not the same kind of "judging" that people think of in a 21st century American context. In the same sermon, Jesus told his disciples they should "Watch out for false prophets...by their fruit you will recognize them" (Mat. 7:15-16). Jesus also frequently gave moral commands and even confronted many teachers of his day, calling them "hypocrites." The very command "Do not judge" shows that Jesus does not shy away from making absolute statements about morality. Jesus himself taught that homosexuality is wrong (see #9).
     When you look at the context of Matthew 7:1-6, you can see that what Jesus is speaking about is holding others to a higher standard than you hold yourself to. See "Hard Bible Verses: Do Not Judge"

9. "Jesus never addresses it."
     Maybe not directly, using the word "homosexual," but he made it clear what his position is on the issue. See my previous post.

10. "But how does it affect your marriage?"
     I don't know of a single person who opposes same-sex marriage who argues that their marriage is going to be hurt. This is a straw man.
     According to the Bible, marriage is a unique relationship created by God that is between one man and one woman for one lifetime. Jesus taught that only God can truly create this union (Matthew 19). Therefore, when the government declares a same-sex relationship a "marriage" it is declaring fiction. Only God can make it a true marriage, and his definition will not change. When the government recognizes marriage relationships, it must have a definition. That definition should be one that the people in that government reach an agreement on. Again, people may want to (wrongly) change the definition of marriages that the government will accept to include additional types of relationships beyond the biblical and traditional understanding of marriage. However, people who believe in the traditional view should have a right to support their view as well. Given that God warns of possible punishment for nations that embrace homosexuality (Leviticus 18 and Romans 1), this is an important political issue for Christians, regardless of the fact that there is no personal impact on our marriages.


Conclusion: Yes, our culture and the Bible are in conflict on this issue. Yes, from our culture's viewpoint, the Bible sounds unreasonable. Equally true, though, is that from the Bible's viewpoint our culture seems unreasonable. There is no argument advanced in support of same-sex relationships that should undermine the reasons for trusting the Bible. See How Do We Know the Bible is God's Word?


Trust the Bible's purpose is to grow your confidence that the Bible is true and the ultimate resource for life." You can join the Facebook group by clicking here.Trust the Bible is a weekday radio program that begins at about 8:10 each morning on WDOG 93.5 in Allendale, SC. You can listen to previous programs online here: http://www.fairfaxfbc.org/trust-the-bible.html

The Bible and Same-Sex Relationships

There is increasing pressure in our culture to affirm same-sex relationships, including marriage. What about the Bible? Is trusting the Bible unreasonable because of its statements on homosexuality? Some answer this question by arguing that the Bible isn't really against homosexuality. I understand the motive for doing so, but the problem is that the Bible is so clear on this subject, it amounts to an argument that you cannot understand anything in the Bible. After all, if we can't know what the Bible teaches on this subject, how can we know what the Bible teaches on any subject? In this post, I will demonstrate from three places in Scripture what the biblical position is. In my next post, I will answer ten common arguments that the biblical position is unreasonable.

I must deal with one immediate objection before moving into the biblical passages. There is an assumption that simply explaining what the Bible says on the topic is unloving. On the contrary, I believe that all of God's commands are given in love, with our best interest in mind. The same Jesus that died on a cross in order to pay for our sin (nothing could possibly be more loving than this), taught that sexual relationship are limited to one man and one woman. Jesus loves more than anyone, so his position must be the loving position, not the other way around. Anyone teaching that biblical commands are wrong or can be ignored is misleading people and putting them on the wrong path, this is not love. I write not to attack any person or group of people, but defend the truthfulness of the most loving message ever written, the Bible.

There are numerous passages that show plainly what the Bible teaches, but I will focus on just three.

1. First, Leviticus 18:22 says, "Do not lie with a man as one lies with a woman; that is detestable." I don't know how anyone could argue that this verse does not declare homosexuality a sin. However, many people do question the relevance of the passage. After all, they say, "Doesn't the Bible also condemn the eating of shellfish, and Christians don't have any problem doing that, right?"

This amounts to an argument that biblical teaching is out of date and everyone must pick and choose what they will believe. Notice first of all that Jesus completely rejects this kind of view of the Bible. He teaches that, "I tell you the truth, until heaven and earth disappear, not the smallest letter, not the least stroke of a pen, will by any means disappear from the Law until everything is accomplished." (Matthew 5:18). Jesus is specifically affirming the relevance and authority of every Old Testament command.

So, does Jesus require all Christians to stop eating shellfish, as Leviticus 11 teaches? Well, no. In fact, that is not what the passage teaches.

Context is the key. In Genesis 12:1, God tells Abraham, "Leave your country, your people and your father's household and go to the land I will show you." This verse does not mean that I  must leave America and go to who knows where. The verse was clearly written to Abraham for a specific time. This verse is still relevant and authoritative over me, because it teaches me to live by faith, like Abraham. But it is not a specific command for me. In the same way, prohibitions against shellfish (which, by the way, are not as strongly worded as prohibitions against sexual sin, including homosexuality) are authoritative and relevant, but not directed to me, they are directed to Israel. I can learn from this command that every area of my life should conform to God's standards, without specifically obeying a command that never addressed Gentiles living after the time of Christ's death and resurrection. The same thing is true about many passages in the New Testament. It is always a matter of context.

Leviticus 18:22, however, comes with a different context. It is for all nations. In Leviticus 18:24, God declares, "'Do not defile yourselves in any of these ways, because this is how the nations that I am going to drive out before you became defiled." In other words, God holds all nations accountable to the standards outlined in Leviticus 18, not just the Israelites. One can chose to reject the Bible (and Jesus) and affirm same-sex relationships, but you cannot study this passage and conclude that both are right.

2. Romans 1:27, "In the same way the men also abandoned natural relations with women and were inflamed with lust for one another. Men committed indecent acts with other men." The passage addressing homosexuality is much longer than what is quoted here and the context makes it even more clear that homosexuality is wrong. Or does it? Recently, gay-affirming Bible interpreters have offered the possibility of a new understanding of this passage.

The "new understanding" offers two possible explanations. First, Paul may not have been aware of loving, long-term same-sex relationships. He is not addressing all homosexual relationships, but only those that are "inflamed with lust" or "indecent." If he knew about the homosexual relationships of today, he would not oppose them.

There are several problems with this argument. First, Paul most likely would have known of various types of homosexual relationships. There were a broad range of same-sex relationships in his time, and he was a well educated and well traveled person. Suggesting he wouldn't know is at best a weak argument from silence. Furthermore, regardless of what Paul knew or didn't know, the text itself does not support a position that is open to same-sex relationships. The text speaks of men abandoning "natural relations with women." We can't simply guess at what Paul's view was and force that on our interpretation of the text. The text itself is very clear. Remember, Jesus taught that the text itself is the very Word of God.

The second possible explanation is that Paul did know and understand about loving, long-term same-sex relationships. Not only that, he believed that same-sex attraction is something that people are basically born with or have no control over whatsoever. When he speaks of abandoning "natural relations," he is talking about going against one's sexual orientation. In other words, it is only wrong to engage in homosexuality if you are a heterosexual. If you are a homosexual, it is fine. Notice though, that this forces the absurd conclusion that Paul is saying a man who is a homosexual would be sinning if he married a woman, he would then be abandoning what comes natural to him! It is also not what the text says. The text is speaking about abandoning "natural relations with women," not abandoning one's sexual orientation. Once again, this is an argument from silence, based on an assumption about Paul's views that has no supporting evidence, that is used to force a rather strange interpretation that the text does not support.

3. Matthew 19:4-6 "Haven't you read," he <Jesus> replied, "that at the beginning the Creator 'made them male and female,' and said, 'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh'? So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate."

Those affirming same-sex relationships often say that Jesus never addressed homosexuality. True, Jesus never used the word homosexuality, but he clearly addressed the topic. In answering a question about divorce, he explains the purpose of sexual relationships and bases it on Genesis 2. Here he speaks of a "man" and "wife" joining together, with the man leaving "father" and "mother." He could have left it at that, but he also pulls a quote from Genesis 1, "male and female" and attaches it to the quote from Genesis 2. He goes out of his way to stress that sexual union was created by God to be a life-long relationship between one man and one woman.

In addition, as I have already stated, Jesus gave the strongest endorsement possible for every command in the Old Testament, which includes Leviticus 18:22.

Furthermore, even if we didn't know of these two strong statements, the idea that Jesus may have approved of homosexuality because he didn't address it is at best a weak argument from silence. He didn't address it directly because no one would have wondered what his position was. In a first century Jewish context, people would assume that a Jewish rabbi was opposed to homosexuality. Jesus was not afraid of controversy, if he held a position so at odds with the rabbis of his day, one that affirmed same-sex relationships, we would almost certainly know about it. However, we don't have to wonder because he does make his position clear in Matthew 19.

One final point, the argument that Jesus did not oppose homosexuality because he didn't directly address it assumes that Jesus' words during his earthly ministry are more important than the rest of the Bible. It concedes that other parts of the Bible oppose homosexuality, but those parts are suspect because they are not contained in quotes attributed to Jesus. That assumption is based on the idea that we might trust Jesus, but we cannot trust the Bible. However, Jesus himself taught that he is God and that the Bible is the Word of God. If anyone thinks that they can follow Jesus and yet reject, say, Leviticus 18:22, they are making a huge mistake. First, they are rejecting what Jesus told his followers to think about the Bible.

Second, they must reject Jesus' teaching that he was God, or reject his teaching that the Bible is God's Word, or both. If Jesus is God, and the Bible is God's Word (both essential beliefs of the Christian faith), then everything, including Leviticus 18:22 is just as much the words of Christ as the "red letters." Rejecting Romans 1 or Leviticus 18, according to Jesus, is the same thing as rejecting the teaching of Jesus.

In the next post, I will respond to ten common objections that the biblical position is unreasonable.


Trust the Bible's purpose is to grow your confidence that the Bible is true and the ultimate resource for life." You can join the Facebook group by clicking here.Trust the Bible is a weekday radio program that begins at about 8:10 each morning on WDOG 93.5 in Allendale, SC. You can listen to previous programs online here: http://www.fairfaxfbc.org/trust-the-bible.html

The Bible and Sex

A common summary of biblical teaching on sex is that it is should only occur within the context of "One man and one woman in a covenant relationship for one lifetime." If that is true, it rules out not only adultery, but remarriage after divorce (with some exceptions, see The Bible and Marriage), AND...any sex before marriage, everything in the lesbian, gay, and bisexual category, and of course, polygamy.

To most people today, this view is obviously wrong. It is also an intensely personal and highly prioritized part of life. A common response is, "What difference does it make to God if I am having sex with my girlfriend?" Or, "But I'm in love with this person, certainly God wants me to be happy." This issue like no other today brings into focus the enormous implications of choosing to trust the Bible. "My way seems right." Or, "Just about everyone agrees with my view." Runs right into, "God says..." Which are you going to choose?

Before I go any further I should point out that according to the Bible God's primary goal for you is not your immediate happiness. Jesus says, "Seek first his kingdom and his righteousness" (Mat. 6:33). God wants you to obey his commands more than he wants you to be happy. Of course, obeying God's commands will lead to what's best for you in the long run.

God loves you so much he sent Jesus to die for your sin - no one else will ever love you like that. So, clearly, what he commands is motivated by his love for you, not some sort of strange desire to place unnecessary limits on your fun. In addition, God is infinitely more capable and qualified to know what is best for us. He knows way more about us individually than we know about ourselves! He knows the future and everything about human history. He designed and created us. We should expect to run into areas where we disagree with him about what is best for us, because in comparison we are largely ignorant when it comes to the topic.

But trusting the Bible is choosing to trust Jesus (He taught us to trust everything in the Bible). It is choosing to believe God loves us. It is choosing to believe his commandments are right and good.

Others question that the Bible really teaches a conservative view on sex. In answering a question about divorce, Jesus answered, "Haven't you read that at the beginning the Creator 'made them male and female,' and said, 'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh'? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate" (Mat. 19:4-6)

Jesus does way more than address divorce. He explains the whole biblical view of sex, based on passages from Genesis one and two. He shows God's intention in creating sex, that it is for one man and one woman in a life-long covenant relationship. This, Jesus says, is the starting point for understanding everything else the Bible teaches about sex.

The Bible says that sex is for producing children (It is commanded in Genesis 1), but this is not the only or even the primary purpose. Proverbs 5:18-20 speaks of enjoying each other sexually with no reference to procreation. 1 Corinthians 7 likewise talks about couples needing to be with each other sexually on a regular basis in order to maintain a healthy relationship. Sex is a physical act that communicates and solidifies a spiritual union between two people.

Therefore, any sexual activity outside of a marriage between a man and a woman is to use sex in a way that God did not intend for it. If you are not married and believe you are ready for sex with another person, then you must also believe you are ready to enter into a life-long covenant relationship with that person. Sometimes STDs and pregnancy are used to scare people away from pre-marital sex or adultery. While there is truth to these arguments, Christians should focus instead on desiring to live a life that is honoring to God. Jesus taught that it is the only kind of life worth living.


Trust the Bible's purpose is to grow your confidence that the Bible is true and the ultimate resource for life." You can join the Facebook group by clicking here.Trust the Bible is a weekday radio program that begins at about 8:10 each morning on WDOG 93.5 in Allendale, SC. You can listen to previous programs online here: http://www.fairfaxfbc.org/trust-the-bible.html

The Miracle of Israel

Some people ask, "Why doesn't God just do one miracle that I can see so that I know He is real?" Well, have you considered the nation of Israel?

Now let me start by saying that God has done many miracles that demonstrate that He is real. Creation itself testifies to his existence and his power. How else could we be here? In addition, the resurrection of Jesus is the most well attested historical event in ancient history and validates the Christian faith.

But I know that many are not satisfied. Maybe you want something you can see happen in the here and now. I would submit to you that Israel is just such a miracle. I'm not saying you have to agree with Israel's politics, but I am saying the very existence of Israel is a powerful witness to the truth of God's Word.

Consider what the Bible says about the existence of the nation of Israel:

"This is what the Lord says:
The One who gives the sun for light by night,
who stirs up the sea and makes its waves roar-
the Lord of Hosts is His name:
If this fixed order departs from My presence-
this is the Lord's declaration-
then also Israel's descendants will cease to be a nation before Me forever."
                                                                                               -Jeremiah 31:35-36

What a bold promise, made nearly 600 years before the birth of Christ! If Israel ever ceased to be a nation, the Bible would be proven false. God did say the Israelites would be scattered to all the nations of the earth, but they would continue to exist as a people who could and would be brought back to the land of Israel. We see this promise in Jeremiah 30:11, Genesis 17:7, Ezekiel 36, and many other places in the Bible.

So, let's suppose that God is not real and the Bible is not His Word. What should we expect to see? Israel, like every other nation-state in ancient Mesopotamia, should have long since ceased to exist. Perhaps, you think there are other exceptions, maybe Egypt? True, the Egyptians in Egypt today can argue they are the descendants of the ancient Egyptians. However, the religion, culture, language, and type of government is completely different. Egypt was also never expelled from its homeland. Any other nation that was- the Phoenicians, Hittites, Moabites, Philistines, Arameans, and many more, ceased to exist in a relatively short period of time.

Unlike all the others, relatively insignificant Israel was basically banished for 1800 years and has returned as a Jewish state, with the Hebrew language, with the ancient Jewish festivals and customs still practiced. Where else in all of human history has anything like this even come remotely close to happening? Not only have Israelites returned to their homeland, but they have returned from nations on every corner of the globe - just as the Bible predicted.

God went on the record, revealing to the ancient prophets the most unlikely of histories for a people. There is no reason to think this prophecy would be anything other than the occasion for the rapid and certain death of the idea that God is behind the Bible. Unless, of course, God is real, Israel has a special God-given role in history, and you can trust the Bible.


Trust the Bible is a weekday radio program that begins at about 8:10 each morning on WDOG 93.5 in Allendale, SC. You can listen to previous programs online here: http://www.fairfaxfbc.org/trust-the-bible.html

What the Bible Says to Fathers

1. Have a God-centered vision for your children.
What do you ultimately hope to accomplish through being a Father? For many, it is simply survive. Do what needs to be done to get them through school, keep them out of as much trouble as possible, and send them off into the world. From there, help them through any crisis that comes up, which is hopefully never. For others, the goal may be to help them get into and succeed in a top level college so they can have a great career. For others, the goal is to see them become a great athlete or highly successful in some other area. What defines "success" as a father for you? The Bible calls on us to have God glorifying goals in every area of life. 1 Corinthians 10:31 says, "So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God." Specifically about raising children, the Bible says, "Sons are a heritage from the LORD, children a reward from him. Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are sons born in one's youth. Blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them" (Psalm 127:3-5). Saying children are like "arrows" means that they are one of the greatest weapons God gives us in achieving our main goal in life, bringing glory to God. Our first priority, what drives us to do what we do as Fathers, must be that we lead our children to love God and his Word.

2. Be the Authority Figure in Their Life.
The Bible tells children, "obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right." This says something to children and parents. God has placed children under our authority. This means we are responsible for how are children are raised and what kinds of rules they must follow. Children need parents, and especially fathers, to set and enforce godly rules in the home and in life. This is a job that cannot be delegated to others. You are the one primarily responsible to require godly behavior in the home, school, and church. Certainly you work with others when your children are not directly under your supervision, but children need to know that  their parents are in charge.

3. "Fathers, do not exasperate your children" (Ephesians 6:4).
Fathers need to discipline their children. However, discipline is different from forcing good behavior. Especially when children are young, yelling and threatening are effective tools to get your children to stop disobeying- at least temporarily. But this is not actually leading them to long-term, good behavior. This is setting the stage for a "rebellious" teenager, one who reaches the age where anger, yelling, and threats are no longer effective, and true training has not taken place. Parents need to set clear rules for their children. They need to explain why the rules are there. Then they need to enforce them consistently. The temptation is to only enforce rules when the parent is in a bad mood and the behavior is really bothering them. Discipline should be motivated out of a long term desire to help your children develop godly habits, not a lashing out in anger.

4. "Instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord" (Ephesians 6:4).
Discipline should not only be reactive against bad behavior, but proactive in teaching good behavior. One of the most important things you can do with your children is read the Bible and pray with them. Explain what different passages in Scripture say to you. Model a heart of obedience to the Word of God. When a child does require discipline for misbehavior, use that as an opportunity to give good teaching, not merely carry out a punishment.


Trust the Bible is a weekday radio program that begins at about 8:10 each morning on WDOG 93.5 in Allendale, SC. Each program seeks to grow your confidence that the Bible is true and the ultimate resource for life. You can listen to previous programs online here: http://www.fairfaxfbc.org/trust-the-bible.html

Prayer

Prayer, and more specifically praying biblically, is essential to success in life. I know this because true success comes from carefully obeying the Bible's teachings (Joshua 1:8) and the Bible frequently commands prayer, teaches about praying, and offers commendable examples of prayer.

Yet prayer creates perhaps the greatest collision between trusting our own thoughts and trusting the Bible. Does the God who made the universe really listen to my prayers? Doesn't God always work in a way that will best accomplish his purposes and plans, and if so, how could my feeble requests change what God will do?

Let's say I'm driving down the interstate in the middle of nowhere. I am almost out of gas. A sign says that the next exit is five miles away. I know that I can just barely make it five more miles before running out completely. I start talking to God, asking him, "Please, let there be a gas station there!" Now, does that make any sense? Let's assume God isn't going to instantly make a gas station appear out of thin air, complete with an employee to work the cash register (a pretty safe assumption). In that case, the gas station I am praying for is either already there, or it isn't.

God could have worked in the past to ensure that a gas station would be there. He may have even done so because he knew the future and knew that at this moment, I would need one to be there. He probably wouldn't do so simply for my convenience. Why would I ever be responsible to keep gas in my car if I knew that anytime I was about to run out, God would make sure I would get to a gas station in time? No, he would have done so because it was ultimately for the good, it fit into his plan.

But, what does my praying now for a gas station to be there have to do with God's decision (which he had already made)? In reality, all prayer faces this problem because God has always known everything about the future, what he will do, and what is best for him to do. Even if I am making a request about something more serious that is for the future, such as "Please keep my Grandmother safe during tomorrow's surgery," doesn't God already know what the right decision is before I pray for it?

Of course, there is an answer to this question, even if we don't know what it is, because the Bible teaches us to pray. I think much of it has to do with how God's sovereign control over all things is true while it is also true that God has made creatures with free will. Our ability to change anything at all makes little since if free will is not real. See http://trustthebible.blogspot.com/2016/04/do-i-have-free-will-or-is-god-in.html

God could have made a world in which he always did what was right regardless of what any human said about it in prayer. However, God decided it would be better to allow humans to have input into his decisions through prayer. He made this decision knowing what free humans would pray in the future and exactly which prayers he would answer favorably.

So saying "God always knows and does what's best," is only a problem for prayer if the "best" world that could exist didn't have meaningful prayer in it. By meaningful prayer, I mean prayer that humans can choose to offer that actually leads God to change circumstances. So, one possible world God could have created would have no meaningful prayer. God would simply always do what he knows to be best. The other possible world is one in which there is meaningful prayer. The world with meaningful prayer would have disadvantages, namely, that God would sometimes act in the best way possible only when people pray. However, there may be advantages to this system that outweigh the disadvantages. Consider the possible advantages to having a world with meaningful prayer:

1. Meaningful prayer motivates people to talk to God and develop a relationship with him. If prayer could not actually change our circumstances, we may be less likely to spend time talking to him.

2. Meaningful prayer helps us appreciate what God does more. We have to come to him and ask him. Anyone applying for a scholarship sees this principle at work. An organization could simply send a check, but the application process for most scholarships helps the applicant think more appreciatively about who is giving the money.

3. Meaningful prayer guards us from trusting in ourselves. Jesus tells us to pray for "our daily bread." Meaning we need to ask daily for God to supply our basic needs. We can do nothing or even take another breath apart from God. Prayer helps us see that.

The Bible tells us that prayer is real and is something we should do. Praying will lead God to change our circumstances. God has decided that in some cases he will only act in the best way when we pray. The consequences of this decision are not as great as the advantages gained by acting on the basis of prayer. So, let us pray! Jesus taught that praying with many words, or praying to impress others is not helpful. We should pray directly to God, calling him "Father." The first priority of our prayers is for God's glory and will to be done (See Matthew 6:6-13).

One key to prayer is recognizing our need for God. Think about when you pray. You pray when you need something. If you have no needs, you will not pray. You pray for health most when you have a health problem. You pray for financial help most when you have a particular financial difficulty. And you will pray for God's glory when you need God to be glorified. The fact is, we all need all of these things all the time. But we pray when we sense our needs. One of the things prayer does is to develop our sense of need for God to act, the very thing that will lead us to pray more! May God help us have a greater sense of need for him and an urgency to pray.


Trust the Bible is a weekday radio program that begins at about 8:10 each morning on WDOG 93.5 in Allendale, SC. Each program seeks to grow your confidence that the Bible is true and the ultimate resource for life. You can listen to previous programs online here: http://www.fairfaxfbc.org/trust-the-bible.html